Maddy was confessing last night about Davis. How fucked up she is over it. Kept giving her anecdotes about me but, hey, what is relating about? Saying, “I think I understand what you're going through.” It's hard to admit that you’ve been a jerk, and the guy you thought was worthwhile actually sucks.

Today I peed on a prickly nettle off Route 40 on the way to Route 66. Right now I am in a concrete wigwam with cable TV.

I could swear that last night I was being very hilarious around Gary and Spyro. Sometimes I think when I'm comfortable I can be really funny consistently for an hour at a time. I'd like to be writing more comedy.

Well, look what happened. Instead of writing morning pages, I had morning drama. Ted was being distant, I felt sure he was seeing his ex Wednesday night and since then he's not sure about him and me.

I was busy today doing the text for the website, but happy to be busy. Not crazy busy either, just had something to do that took me all day and was creative but not entirely my generation.

I just realized how many little things I forgot today. I hate my shrink today because I feel like an idiot, like I do everything wrong. She thinks I make a fool of myself all the time, which is only partially true - only partially true that she thinks it, only partially true that it's true.

I’m at my desk, writhing and wringing the beanbag wrist rest, waiting for either my mother or H5 or neither of them to call me back.

One month with Ted. Mostly great so far, so easy, no fights. I’m not totally in love with him, but I really like him, and the more time we spend together the more I see how different he is than anybody I’ve been with.

Twenty-six years old, and I no longer suck my thumb. Amazing. Unbelievable. And I haven’t hit myself since June, since I finally dumped Jack, no take-backs.

Whose handwriting is this? I rarely recognize it as mine. I think it looks very masculine, because it doesn’t care if you can read it later.